i feel unbelievably sick.

there was a point when mika was a stranger to me...i refused to let anyone inside my bowie bubble...eventually i crawled out of my world when all i found was lost shadows...this mika was my change and the light i needed.

time went on and i had the silly hopes of a child and the unacomplished dreams of a fool...deep down i wanted to believe things could be different. things would be different. still this did not hide what i truely new. this would never happen for me.

all i had ever wanted was to feel whole. i still ache for this..only knowing that who i wanted to find completion with will not be found.

dreams where never reality but my reality was always filled with dreams....

on another note....who i found false comfort in wasnt ever real. they would not like me for who i show out to be. this person only looks for uniqueness...i am far from this in yet so far from normal.

i have to stand up and realize what i thought i saw never was....what i wished i had never existed....the love i saught never lived..

i say sorry to those hopes and dreams that were gathered to put me to life...i also apologize to those of you who are reading my lost words and confused thoughts....dont try to understand...it would certainly be easier....

the reason this is in the mika thread is that it had/has more to do with him than either him or you will no....it may be moved if wanted...

im sorry what i felt...though it did make a very nice poem.

theres my fortune cookie...

all i had ever wanted was to feel whole. i still ache for this..only knowing that who i wanted to find completion with will not be found.

 

dreams where never reality but my reality was always filled with dreams....

 

on another note....who i found false comfort in wasnt ever real. they would not like me for who i show out to be. this person only looks for uniqueness...i am far from this in yet so far from normal.

 

i have to stand up and realize what i thought i saw never was....what i wished i had never existed....the love i saught never lived..

 

i say sorry to those hopes and dreams that were gathered to put me to life...i also apologize to those of you who are reading my lost words and confused thoughts....dont try to understand...it would certainly be easier....

 

 

i

When you can recognise a dream for what it is,

you have learned a powerful lesson about life and yourself. Are you unhappy?

i dont no...i feel...nothing?

numb maybe......

i dont no...i feel...nothing?

numb maybe......

I've been through numb - you do come out the other side eventually. Sometimes when you're hurt it's your brain's way of coping and shielding you until you are strong again.

hmm.........